The 11th Husband of a Virgin

A young man married a beautiful woman who had previously divorced 10 husbands.

On their wedding night, she told her new husband to “Please be gentle; I’m still a Virgin“. 

“What?” said the puzzled groom. “How can that be if you’ve been married ten times?”

  • “Well, husband #1 was a Sales Representative; he kept telling me how great it was going to be.”
  • “Husband #2 was in Software Services; he was never really sure how it was supposed to function; but he said he’d look into it and get back with me”.
  • “Husband #3 was from Field Services; he said that everything checked out diagnostically but he just couldn’t get the system up.”
  • “Husband #4 was in Telemarketing; even though he knew he had the order, he didn’t know when he would be able to deliver.”
  • “Husband #5 was an Engineer, he understood the basic process but he wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state of the-art method.”
  • “Husband #6 was from Administration; he thought he knew how but he wasn’t sure whether it was his job or not.”
  • “Husband #7 was in Marketing; although he had a product, he was never sure how to position it.”
  • “Husband #8 was a Psychiatrist; all he did was talk about it.”
  • “Husband #9 was a Gynecologist; all he did was look at it.”
  • “Husband #10 was a Stamp Collector; all he ever did was lick it….. God I miss him.”

“But now that I’ve married you, I’m so excited.”

“Wonderful,” said the husband, “but why?”

“You’re with the ‘GOVERNMENT’. This time I KNOW I’m gonna get screwed.”