COP HUMOR…..3

COP PULLS ME OVER, SAYS “YOUR EYES LOOK RED, YOU BEEN SMOKIN’ WEED?”
I REPLIED “YOUR EYES LOOK GLAZED, YOU BEEN EATING DOUGHNUTS?”

I’M SO HAPPY TO SEE THEM PULLING OVER THE SPEEDERS IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD

A COP WITH A DRUG SNIFFING DOG SAYS TO ME
“THIS DOG TELLS ME YOU’RE ON DRUGS”
I SAID “I’M ON DRUGS?……YOU’RE THE ONE TALKING TO A DOG!”

IRONY: THEY’D NEVER GUESS.

I HAVE BEEN SITTING HERE FOR 5 MINUTES WITH A COP BEHIND ME ….
STONED OUT OF MY MIND … WTF DO I DO???

DESTINY … SOMETIMES, YOU JUST DESERVE IT!

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3 thoughts on “COP HUMOR…..3

  1. These are hysterical. I, literally, LMAO!!
    I was in the nightclub business and I’d get out of the club about 2:30 a.m. (Texas). I was loaded! I was driving VERY slow.
    A cop pulls me over…and I thought to myself, “Man I am screwed!”.
    He said, “Mam, have you been smoking tonight?(MJ).
    I replied, “No, Sir! That is against the law! I am so drunk that I didn’t want to hurt anyone or hit someone’s car.”

    He followed me all the way home to make sure I got home okay. And, that was even out of his city limits!

    Like

      • I was rowdy. I have one more. Again, I left the club totally loaded. I was almost home. I knew couldn’t make it. I stopped the car and left it about a mile from my house. I headed out walking. I got home, and guess what! I left my house keys in the damn car! Well, I had to get in the house. So I started walking back to the car to get my house keys.

        A cop was driving by and did a U-Turn to ask me if I was okay. I said, “Office, I am so damn drunk that I parked my car about a mile up the road. I LEFT MY KEYS TO THE HOUSE IN THE CAR!

        He replied, “Mam, just get in the car and we’ll drive you to get your house keys; and you can pick up your car tomorrow. Well, I was so embarrassed, I said, “Officer, I am so stupid to do this, I don’t deserve a ride.”

        He replied, “Either get in the car or go to jail. I GOT IN THE CAR. I got my house keys and he drove me back home again.

        Like

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