“When In Doubt, Empty The Magazine” “Marine Sniper – You can run, but you’ll just die tired!” “Machine Gunners – Accuracy By Volume” “Except For Ending Slavery, Fascism, Nazism and Communism, WAR has Never Solved Anything.” “U.S. Marines – Certified Counselors to the 72 Virgins Dating Club.” “U.S. Air Force – Travel Agents To Allah”…
Tag: laugh
Take a look at the ‘new’ 2013 Fuel Efficient Car
With gas prices on the rise…..get the 2013 fuel efficient car. No need to change the oil, and gas isn’t a problem either. All you need is the determination and desire to get wherever you need to go. Oh yeah, you’ll also need a really good pair of shoes with great traction. It also easily…
CURIOUS!!!
The English language has some wonderfully anthropomorphic collective nouns for the various groups of animals. We are all familiar with a Herd of cows, a Flock of chickens, a School of fish and a Gaggle of geese. However, less widely known is: Pride of lions a Murder of crows an Exaltation of doves and, presumably…
Brian Sullivan
A man walked out to the street and caught a taxi just going by. He got into the taxi and the cabbie said, “Perfect timing. You’re just like Brian.” Passenger: “Who?” Cabbie: “Brian Sullivan. He’s a guy who did everything right all the time. Like my coming along when you needed a cab, things happen…
Betty White quotes (continued)
People have told me, “Betty, Facebook is a great way to get in touch with old friends.” At my age, if I want to get in touch with old friends, I need a Ouija board. Doctors say that a glass of wine a day can extend your life. Cheers. “I don’t care who anybody sleeps…
Betty White quotes
Betty White really knows what she’s talking about……. WISDOM —– from a WISE LADY!!! Why do people say “Grow some balls”? Balls are weak & sensitive! If you really wanna get tough, grow a vagina, those things take a pounding! Just saw the first Christmas commercial of the season. It really got me in the…
Pillsbury Dough Boy Dead!
Please join me in remembering YET ANOTHER great icon of the entertainment community. The Pillsbury Dough Boy died yesterday of a yeast infection and traumatic complications from repeated pokes in the belly. He was 71. Dough Boy is survived by his wife (Play Dough), three children (John Dough, Jane Dough and Dill Dough), plus they…
EMERGENCY ADVICE for men!!!
What to do if you have a four hour erection…… If you use medication for erectile dysfunction and have an erection lasting more than four hours immediately look at the picture below.
OMG!!!
Someone’s always thinking! Read the short paragraph below this great shirt. Bi-Partisan approved, available in all sizes. Get one while supplies last! I was eating lunch on the 20th of February with my 7 year-old grandson and I asked him, “What day is tomorrow?” He said, “It’s President’s Day!” He is a smart kid. I…
Oprah and the Obama’s
Flying on Air Force One, Obama looked at Oprah, chuckled and said, “You know, I could throw a $1,000 bill out of the window right now and make somebody very happy.” Oprah shrugged her shoulders and replied, “I could throw ten $100 bills Out of the window and make ten people very happy.” Michelle added,…
Pray for your President
Psalm 109:8 My daughter and I were in slow-moving traffic the other day and we were stopped behind a car that had an unusual Obama bumper sticker on it. It read: “Pray for Obama. Psalm 109:8”. When we got home I got out the Bible and opened it up to the scripture. I started laughing…
I thought of you, AGAIN!
A ‘friend’ passed this to me; so I’m passing it on to you because I Care . WHEN I ASKED MYSELF WHO MIGHT NEED AN ANGEL TODAY, I THOUGHT OF YOU!!! They didn’t want her, so they sent her to me… I don’t want her so, I’m sending her to You! The rules are simple:…
A well dressed WalMart shopper…
Finally … A well dressed WalMart shopper. What a BRAVE and well-dressed lady!!! The per person Medicare insurance premium will increase from the present monthly fee of $96.40, rising to: $99.90 in 2012; $120.20 in 2013; and $247.00 in 2014. These are provisions incorporated in the Obamacare legislation, purposely delayed so as not to ‘confuse’…
Why we shoot deer in the wild.
(A letter from someone who wants to remain anonymous, who farms, writes well and actually tried this) I had this idea that I could rope a deer, put it in a stall, feed it up on corn for a couple of weeks, then kill it and eat it. The first step in this adventure was…
call center…
We’ve all talked to this guy. At last, a picture of him! Ujibar was trying to get a job in India. The Personnel Manager said, “Ujibar, you have passed all the tests, except one. It is a simple test of your English language skills. Unless you pass it, you cannot qualify for this job.” Ujibar…
Cadbury’s Chocolate…(did you know this?)
I did NOT know this! DO YOU EAT CADBURY’S CHOCOLATE? We were raised on CADBURY’S chocolate as kids and even into adulthood but I will never eat it again!! I hope from now on you will throw yours away whenever you are given any. It seems as though nothing is safe to eat anymore. This…
Miracle in the Alcohol Aisle…
Well…well…well, look at this here. Does this look like something you have personally seen out in public? Isn’t it amazing how many vehicles have handicapped plates or placards but the occupants of said vehicles are NOT handicapped? AND A FEW MORE ITEMS OF INTEREST…
Obama’s Milwaukee Visit
Thought you would appreciate this, since it was the SMARTEST MAN IN THE WORLD observing his surroundings. Everyone makes mistakes; however, if this error was made by Romney or Santorum, all hell would have broken loose and the “independent press” would have crucified them. When Obama stopped in at Master Lock in Milwaukee Wisconsin, he…
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