A Marine was taking college classes between his deployments to Afghanistan. One of the courses had a professor that was an atheist and a member of the ACLU. One day the professor shocked everyone by walking into class, looking up and stating “God, if you are real, I want you to come down and knock…
Tag: college
A Must Read…
“Good morning,” said a woman as she walked up to the man sitting on the ground. The man slowly looked up. This was a woman clearly accustomed to the finer things of life. Her coat was new. She looked like she had never missed a meal in her life. His first thought was that she…
20 Things a Father Should Tell His Daughter!
1) Pay attention to the way a man loves his mother. That is the way he will love you. 2) You can do anything a man can do, including organic chemistry, unclogging toilets and assembling IKEA furniture. 3) Older women wear makeup so THEY can look like YOU. Less is more. A lot less is…
Bumper Stickers Seen on Military Bases iii
MURPHY’S LAWS OF COMBAT 1. You are not Superman. 2. Suppressive fires — won’t. 3. If it’s stupid but works, it isn’t stupid. 4. Don’t look conspicuous — it draws fire. 5. Don’t draw fire; it irritates the people around you. 6. When in doubt, empty the magazine. 7. Never share a fighting hole with…
Bumper Stickers Seen on Military Bases ii
“Happiness Is A Belt-Fed Weapon” “It’s God’s Job to Forgive Bin Laden – It’s Our Job To Arrange The Meeting” “Artillery Brings Dignity to What Would Otherwise Be Just A Vulgar Brawl” “One Shot, Twelve Kills – U.S. Naval Gun Fire Support ” “My Kid Fought In Iraq So Your Kid Can Party In College”…
Bumper Stickers Seen on Military Bases
“When In Doubt, Empty The Magazine” “Marine Sniper – You can run, but you’ll just die tired!” “Machine Gunners – Accuracy By Volume” “Except For Ending Slavery, Fascism, Nazism and Communism, WAR has Never Solved Anything.” “U.S. Marines – Certified Counselors to the 72 Virgins Dating Club.” “U.S. Air Force – Travel Agents To Allah”…
Economics and Socialism
An economics professor at a local college made a statement that he had never failed a single student before, but had recently failed an entire class. That class had insisted that Obama’s socialism worked and that no one would be poor and no one would be rich, a great equalizer. The professor then said, “OK,…
Catching Pigs…
There was a chemistry professor in a large college that had some exchange students in the class. One day while the class was in the lab, the Prof noticed one young man, an exchange student, who kept rubbing his back and stretching as if his back hurt. The professor asked the young man what was…
dog and college…
A young cowboy from Montana goes off to college. Half way through the semester, having foolishly squandered all his money … he calls home. “Dad,” he says, “You won’t believe what modern education is developing! They actually have a program here in Missoula that will teach our dog, Ole’ Blue how to talk!” “That’s amazing,”…