This real arsehole looked at my beer belly last night and sarcastically said, “Is that Corona or Blue?” I said, “There’s a fucking tap underneath, taste it.” ***** I was talking to a girl in the bar last night. She said, “If you lost a few kilos, had a shave and got your hair cut,…
Tag: Jesus
I Am Still the Light!!!
Twas’ 11 days before Christmas, around 9:38, when 20 beautiful children stormed through heaven’s gate. Their smiles were contagious, their laughter filled the air. They could hardly believe all the beauty they saw there. They were filled with such joy, they didn’t know what to say. They remembered nothing of what had happened earlier that…
A Must Read…
“Good morning,” said a woman as she walked up to the man sitting on the ground. The man slowly looked up. This was a woman clearly accustomed to the finer things of life. Her coat was new. She looked like she had never missed a meal in her life. His first thought was that she…
A Nativity Scene and shepherd
A Nativity Scene was erected in a church yard. During the night the folks came across this scene. An abandoned dog was looking for a comfortable, protected place to sleep. He chose baby Jesus as his comfort. No one had the heart to send him away so he was there all night. We should all have the good sense…
2 Coffees….
Having arrived at the Gates of Heaven, Barrack Obama meets a man with a beard. ‘Are you Mohammed?’ he asks. ‘No my son, I am St. Peter; Mohammed is higher up.’ Peter then points to a ladder that rises into the clouds. Delighted that Mohammed should be higher than St. Peter, Obama climbs the ladder…
New school prayer to meet government requirements!!!
By a 15 yr. old school kid who got an A+ for this entry. (TOTALLY AWESOME)!!! Since the Pledge of Allegiance and The Lord’s Prayer are not allowed in most public schools anymore because the word ‘God’ is mentioned…..a kid in Arizona wrote the attached NEW school prayer: “New Pledge of Allegiance” ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Now I…
3 good arguments that…
GOD ALWAYS ENJOYS A GOOD LAUGH! There were 3 good arguments that Jesus was Black: 1. He called everyone brother 2. He liked Gospel 3. He didn’t get a fair trial But then, there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Jewish: 1. He went into His Father’s business 2. He lived at home…
Robin Williams quotes…3
Never pick a fight with an ugly person, they have got nothing to lose. And some people say Jesus wasn’t Jewish. Of COURSE he was Jewish! 30 years old, single, lives with his parents, come on! He works in his father’s business, is mom thought he was God’s gift, he’s Jewish! Give it up! If…
Oops!
LIFE AFTER DEATH “DO YOU BELIEVE IN LIFE AFTER DEATH?” THE BOSS ASKED ONE OF HIS EMPLOYEES. “YES, SIR,” THE NEW EMPLOYEE REPLIED. “WELL, THEN, THAT MAKES EVERYTHING JUST FINE,” THE BOSS WENT ON. “AFTER YOU LEFT EARLY YESTERDAY TO GO TO YOUR GRANDMOTHER’S FUNERAL, SHE STOPPED IN TO SEE YOU! ***************************************************** PALM SUNDAY …
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