Tag: humorous

How Alabama Did It…

Simply to achieve Radical Clarity. Incentive to play at Alabama ….. Incentive to play at Notre Dame…….. Any questions?

Do Dogs go to Heaven?

Absolutely unreal that this actually happened! These two churches face each other across a busy street. ALL DOGS GO TO HEAVEN ONLY HUMANS GO TO HEAVEN READ THE BIBLE GOD LOVES ALL HIS CREATIONS DOGS INCLUDED DOGS DON’T HAVE SOULS THIS IS NOT OPEN FOR DEBATE CATHOLIC DOGS GO TO HEAVEN PRESBYTERIAN DOGS CAN TALK…

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3 good arguments that…

GOD ALWAYS ENJOYS A GOOD LAUGH!   There were 3 good arguments that Jesus was Black: 1.   He called everyone brother 2.   He liked Gospel 3.   He didn’t get a fair trial But then, there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Jewish: 1.   He went into His Father’s business 2.   He lived at home…

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Breast Feeding in Public Causing Traffic Jam…

If you are offended by seeing naked body parts, don’t go any further!! (Rated M for Mature: language or thoughts) Breast Feeding in Public Causing Traffic Jam What were you thinking????

Men at work…2

Using balcony railing for ladder support. Lifting heavy appliances through window using a ladder. Window washing without safety harness. Lunch in the shade. Window unit air conditioner maintenance. THEY MAY NOT BE THE SAFEST WAY IMAGINABLE, BUT YOU HAVE TO AT LEAST GIVE THEM CREDIT FOR INGENUITY! |1|  |2|

Men at work…

MEN CAN COME UP WITH THE MOST INTERESTING AND DIVERSE WAYS TO GET ANY JOB DONE! How to do maintenance on the top of a stair landing. How to extend the ladder you’re using. How to perform vehicle maintenance without a vehicle lift. Working on an inside corner of a multilevel building. |1|  |2|

Halloween costume contest winner! I

Just now… the votes have finally been tabulated! The Halloween costume contest winner. The Peter Pan Costume!!!! AND HERE ARE THE RUNNERS UP… In FIRST PLACE we have Ripley in ‘Aliens’ VOTE FOR YOUR FAVORITES BELOW Beetlejuice Edward Scissorhands (male) Edward Scissorhands (female) |1|  |2|  |3|  |4|

nose ring…

MY 15 YEAR OLD DAUGHTER ASKED ME IF SHE COULD GET A NOSE RING? SO I BOUGHT HER ONE!

photoshop-six months later…

GET THE BODY YOU DESERVE IN 6 MONTHS… BECAUSE 6 MONTHS IS THE TIME REQUIRED TO LEARN ‘PHOTOSHOP’! THE POWER OF PHOTOSHOP: SEEMS LEGIT TO ME PHOTOSHOP: What a little photoshop can fix FAIL: WHEN YOUR MUSCLES RUIN YOUR FURNITURE

The Tortoise and The Hare…

This is the classic tale of the tortoise and the hare and their famous race. “First one home wins.” “Deal.” “FUCK!” MORAL: Being the fastest doesn’t mean you win the race!

There IS an advantage…

THE ADVANTAGE TO BEING A MUSLIM? … WHEN YOU SWITCH GIRL FRIENDS YOU CAN KEEP THE SAME PICTURE ON YOUR DESK! Wife #1; Wife #2; Wife #3 & Wife #4 all say: We’re All treated Equally Under Islamic Law An advantage of being an ex-Muslim middle-Eastener living in North America, is that i can openly…

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retired husband….

After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to Target. Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women – she loves to browse. Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter from the local…

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remember your glasses…..

Yesterday, my wife asked why I didn’t do something useful with my time. She suggested I go to the VFW and hang out with the guys. I did this and when I got home last night I told her that I had joined a parachute club. She said “Are you nuts? You’re over 60 years…

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Pray for Leroy….

The preacher said, “Anyone with ‘special needs’ who wants to be prayed over, please come forward to the front by the altar.” With that, Leroy got in line, and when it was his turn, the preacher asked, “Leroy, what do you want me to pray about for you?” Leroy replied, “Preacher, I need you to…

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