father offers advice to son on wedding night

This Father Offers Advice To His Son On His Wedding Night. The Result Is Priceless. Mike was going to be married to Karen, so his father sat him down for a little chat. He said, Mike, let me tell you something. On my wedding night in our honeymoon suite I took off my pants, handed…

man versus blimp

THIS MAN JUST WANTED TO DO SOMETHING NICE FOR HIS DAUGHTER. BUT WHAT HAPPENED NEXT ALMOST GAVE HIM A HEART ATTACK. Last night my wife was playing tennis and it was just my daughter and myself at home. I bought a small helium tank from a party store, and we put a blimp together. And…

A Father’s Words of Wisdom

Your Father Probably Told You A Few Things, But Just In Case He Wasn’t Around Enough, Here Are Some Words Of Wisdom You Might Have Missed Out On:   Go for women you perceive to be “out of your league.” You’ll surprise yourself. Never have sex with anyone that doesn’t want it as much as…

heart touching story

A doctor entered the hospital in a hurry after being called in for an urgent surgery. He answered the call asap, changed his clothes and went directly to the surgery block. He found the boy’s father pacing in the hall waiting for the doctor. On seeing him, the dad yelled: “Why did you take all this…

20 Things a Father Should Tell His Daughter!

1) Pay attention to the way a man loves his mother. That is the way he will love you. 2) You can do anything a man can do, including organic chemistry, unclogging toilets and assembling IKEA furniture. 3) Older women wear makeup so THEY can look like YOU. Less is more. A lot less is…

How to make a man/woman HAPPY!

HOW TO MAKE A MAN HAPPY 1. Feed him 2. Sleep with him 3. Leave him with peace 4. Don’t check his phone (Msgs) 5. Don’t bother him with his movements So whats so hard about that ? HOW TO MAKE A WOMAN HAPPY It’s really not too difficult but…. To make a woman happy,…

The Fence

There once was a little boy who had a bad temper. His father gave him a bag of nails and told him that every time he lost his temper, he must hammer a nail into the fence. The first day the boy had driven 37 nails into the fence. Over the next few weeks as…

New school prayer to meet government requirements!!!

By a 15 yr. old school kid who got an A+ for this entry. (TOTALLY AWESOME)!!! Since the Pledge of Allegiance and The Lord’s Prayer are not allowed in most public schools anymore because the word ‘God’ is mentioned…..a kid in Arizona wrote the attached NEW school prayer: “New Pledge of Allegiance” ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Now I…

Letter From A Mother to A Daughter!

THIS IS DEDICATED TO ALL THE SENIOR MOTHERS OUT THERE – INCLUDING MY OWN MOTHER… [THIS COULD ALSO PERTAIN TO SENIOR FATHERS]. “My dear girl, the day you see I’m getting old, I ask you to please be patient, but most of all, try to understand what I’m going through. If when we talk, I…

A New Spin…

It seems that every couple of days New Orleans loses one of its treasured ENTREPRENEURS. Lets get the players straight before we go on with this. Interpretation of data not verified but… LARMONDO “FLAIR” ALLEN His Companion: Kawanner Armstrong His Sons : Christian Allen Kwan Allen Larmondo Allen, Jr. His Daughters: Deidra Allen Larmenshell Allen Lamonshea…

nose ring…

MY 15 YEAR OLD DAUGHTER ASKED ME IF SHE COULD GET A NOSE RING? SO I BOUGHT HER ONE!

Son’s Letter to Dad…

A father passing by his son’s bedroom, was astonished to see that the bed was nicely made, and everything was picked up. Then, he saw an envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow. It was addressed, ‘Dad.’ With the worst premonition, he opened the envelope and read the letter, with trembling hands. Dear Dad, It…

Blonde Joke of the Day…..

A blonde phone call to Mom: “Hi Mom, it’s me.” “Hi Sally, are you okay? I thought you were with your father at the hardware store looking for a drill.” “Yeah, I was, but I got arrested and they’ve let me make one phone call and that’s why I’m calling you.” “Oh my god, what happened?” “Oh, I…

daughter (or son) talk…

A young woman was about to finish her first year of college. Like so many others her age, she considered herself to be very liberal, and among other liberal ideals, was very much in favor of higher taxes to support more government programs, in other words redistribution of wealth. She was deeply ashamed that her…

A Blue Rose

Having four visiting family members, my wife was very busy, so I offered to go to the store for her to get some needed items which included light bulbs, paper towels, trash bags, detergent and Clorox. So off I went. I scurried around the store, gathered up my goodies and headed for the checkout counter,…