Santa pick-up lines

“I’ll make you shake like a bowl full of jelly.” “When was the last time you did it in a sleigh?” “I put the ‘scroo’ in Scrooge.” “Ever make it with a fat guy, with a whip?” “I’ve got something you can hang a wreath on.” “One hour with me and you’ll see flyin’ reindeer!”…

the real reason there’s an angel on top of the Christmas tree

When four of Santa’s elves got sick, and the trainee elves did not produce the toys as fast as the regular elves, Santa was beginning to feel the pressure of being behind schedule. Then Mrs. Claus told Santa that her Mum was coming to visit. This stressed Santa even more. When he went to harness…

an engineer’s perspective of Christmas

There are approximately two billion children (persons under 18) in the world. However, since Santa does not visit children of Muslim, Hindu, Jewish or Buddhist (except maybe in Japan) religions, this reduces the workload for Christmas night to 15% of the total, or 378 million (according to the population reference bureau). At an average (census)…