A young Italian girl was going on a date. Her Nonna said: ‘Sita here ana letame tella you about this-a younga boy.’ ‘He’s agonna try ana kiss you, you are agonna likea dat, but don’t let him do dat.’ ‘He’s agonna try ana kiss your breasts, you are agonna likea dat too, but don’ta let…
Author: letvent
Resident on the third planet from the Sun. Looking for some small measure of levity in this mad, mad world. We all need a little brightness to counter the darkness around us. CALGON...take me away!
Irish Humor……
Joe says to Paddy: “Close your curtains the next time you’re shagging your wife. The whole street was watching and laughing at you yesterday.” Paddy says: “Well the joke’s on them stupid bastards because I wasn’t even at home yesterday.” Paddy says to Mick – “I’m ready for a holiday, only this year I’m going…
Husband, Wife & a Convict…
A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns and finds a young couple in bed. He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair, while tying the girl to the bed he gets on top of…
Hitman on the Golf Course…
Two old friends were just about to tee off at the first hole of their local golf course when a guy carrying a golf bag called out to them, ‘Do you mind if I join you, my partner didn’t turn up?’ ‘Sure,’ they said, ‘You’re welcome.’ So they started playing and enjoyed the game and…
Beautiful Text…..
My wife being the romantic sort, just sent me a text…………. “If you are sleeping, send me your dreams. If you are laughing, send me your smile. If you are eating, send me a bite. If you are drinking, send me a sip. If you are crying, send me your tears. I love you.” I…
Growing up without a cell phone…
If you are 36, or older, you might think this is hilarious! When I was a kid, adults used to bore me to tears with their tedious diatribes about how hard things were when they were growing up; what with walking twenty-five miles to school every morning….Uphill… Barefoot…BOTH ways….yadda, yadda, yadda And I remember promising…
Good Information for All of Us!
Forward this as received, but without comment. DO NOT ADD A SINGLE WORD Yes, he told us in advance what he planned to do. Few were listening. The following is a narrative taken from a 2008 Sunday morning televised “Meet The Press’. From Sunday’s 07 Sept. 2008 11:48:04 EST, Televised “Meet the Press” THE THEN…
Goodbye……
To help save the economy, the Government will announce next month that the Immigration Department will start deporting seniors (instead of illegal’s) in order to lower Social Security and Medicare costs. Older people are easier to catch and will not remember how to get back home. I started to cry when I thought of you….
Golf Joke…..
A Husband takes his wife to play her first game of golf. Of course, the wife promptly hacked her first shot right through the window of the biggest house adjacent to the course. The husband cringed, ‘I warned you to be careful! Now we’ll have to go up there, find the owner, apologize and see…
Brainwashed….
IF YOU’RE BRAINWASHED AND YOU KNOW IT. CLAP YOUR HANDS. [that is if Obama has brainwashed you]
Blockage…
Obama blocked the Keystone pipeline which would create 30,000 + jobs and stimulus to hundreds of local businesses. Since Obama is anti business, a socialist who believes the government knows best and must control the means of production, he feels that the only way to stimulate the economy and win reelection in November is to…
2011 Deaths [statistics]
323 DEATHS BY GUNS 496 DEATHS BY HAMMERS 650 DEATHS BY KNIVES 12,000 DEATHS BY DRUNK DRIVERS 195,000 DEATHS BY MEDICAL MALPRACTICE YOU ARE SIX HUNDRED TIMES MORE LIKELY TO DIE BY USING YOUR OBAMACARE, THAN BY A SEMI-AUTOMATIC RIFLE. SOOOO, FEEL SICK?
Presidential Cars…
If you like cars, this is kind of cool . . . President Truman in the Lincoln made for President Roosevelt President Eisenhower in 1953 El Dorado 1950 Lincoln with first bubble top – Eisenhower’s idea 1961 Continental X100 – Kennedy was shot in this vehicle 1972 Lincoln – Nixon, Ford, Carter and Reagan 1983…
God loves drunk people too!!!
A man and his wife were awakened at 3:00 am by a loud pounding on the door. The man gets up and goes to the door where a drunken stranger, standing in the pouring rain, is asking for a push. “Not a chance,” says the husband, “it is 3:00 in the morning!” He slams the…
Getting a Shave!……
George W Bush and Barack Obama somehow ended up at the same barber shop. As they sat there, each being worked on by a different barber, not a word was spoken. The barbers were even afraid to start a conversation, for fear it would turn to politics. As the barbers finished their shaves, the one…
Eggs & 112…..
Friends & Family, About Eggs Mixed with Water……. Important Message!!!! Please take a few minutes & read. It could save your life!!!!!!!!! Didn’t know if you knew about eggs mixed with water…….so that is why I’m sending this on. Be Safe! A MESSAGE FROM THE OFFICE OF ATTORNEY GENERAL STATE OF MICHIGAN: SITUATION… While driving…
Donations for Congress…..
A driver is stuck in a traffic jam on the highway outside Washington, DC. Nothing Is moving…. Suddenly, a man knocks on the car window. The driver rolls down the window and asks, “What’s going on?” “Terrorists have kidnapped Congress and they’re asking for a $100 million dollar ransom! Otherwise,they are going to douse them…
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